Thank Goodness I Don't Have to Wake Up and Be Her!

I recently decided that part time employment might be a good option for our family right now.  So, I got online and looked for jobs.  A bit of research on Craigs List and up pops what seems like a great part time job -- a part time innkeeper.  It appears to be mostly part time on the weekends, and some times during on the week.  Not ideal but the organization they promote is a leading one that puts on local workshops for women on varying topics, from writing workshops to spirituality, to finding inner peace.  I was excited because I like their image, and what they stand for.  They want a resume but after 25 years at home, and only working running a barn with 30 horses, and a lesson program for 75 kids I knew they wouldn't call me.  So I sent them a very basic email outlining my experience and what I could bring to the job and I hoped for the best.

Completely by surprise I got a phone call to come and an interview.  I spoke to him, but after a few days thought that I really didn't want to interview.  I don't have a wardrobe that would be good for this type of position, and for a part-time job, I didn't really want to invest in one.  However, a day later the same man calls me back and wants to set up a time.  Okay, I'll go.  What can I lose?  I'll get some interview experience after being out of the work force for a number of years.

I show up on the day of the interview, dressed in my only nice outfit.  Funky, but neat.  Large funky earrings, purple silk shirt, and leggings.  I'm comfortable and I feel confident.  The gentleman who called was meeting me, and we were both there on time.  We spent thirty minutes together.  It was lovely.  We talked about my life, about my children, about the job.  And then thirty minutes late, the Founder of the organization comes flying in, claiming she first has to settle her mail somewhere.  Both he and I were taken aback by her response but I had no real idea at that point who she was.

She comes in, sits down and immediately asks for my resume.  I clearly state my reasoning for not having one, but she insists I must have one.  Okay, make a mental note -- send resume.  She then goes on to talk about herself and her role in the Foundation.  The arrogance is exuding from her every pore, and I find the hairs on my neck standing up.  But I continue on with the interview because maybe I'm reading it wrong.  She asks if I'm proficient in computers.  I clearly state, once again, that yes, I am quite proficient.  She then proceeds to chuckle and remind the man I had been speaking to about the woman who said the same thing, but "was afraid to hit the send button on an email".  By now, she has insulted me twice.  Still, we move on and I'm eyeing the door knowing there is no way on God's green earth that I want to have anything at all to do with her.  I can endure only a few more minutes in this room with her arrogance, and condescending ways.

Her next question should have caused me to stand up from my seat and walk out immediately.  But I was so shocked.  She had the audacity to question how my husband felt about my working on the weekends.  I was flabbergasted.  Number one, my husband doesn't make decisions about my employment. We're in a partnership and we discuss these major changes in lifestyles prior to pursuing them.  It was an incredible sexist, rude and offensive question.  I tried to silence myself from pointing out that she was running an entire foundation based on aiding women to become stronger in themselves, yet she was tearing them down while she was trying to hire them.  She wanted the ones that paid her to be strong, but the ones that actually worked for her needed to be weak enough so that she could manipulate them.  It was disgusting.

The interview ended.  I knew, without a doubt, the institute they so bragged about what not the institute I thought it was.  Nor did I want the job.  All night I mulled it over in my head.  The more I thought about it, the more I stewed.  Finally, at first morning's light I wrote an email thanking him for the opportunity to interview after all these years.  Then I addressed each and every question, or comment she had.  I further wrote that when I said I was proficient, that's what I meant.  I do not feather the truth -- I felt that she essentially questioned my integrity.  I addressed my absolute outrage at her sexist, insulting, and surely illegal question regarding my husband's liking my seeking a weekend job.  I ended it with assuring them that while I was absolutely positive I was the right candidate, but there was no way in good conscious could I work with someone so narrow minded.  It was a difficult letter to send -- and not because I couldn't hit the "send" button, but because I really wanted it to be read for what it was.  The truth.  I wanted her to know that you cannot go around and be so arrogant and condescending while walking through life.

I am reminded of a saying from an old friend from many years ago.  "Just be thankful you don't have to wake up and be her."  Thank my lucky stars!  I cannot believe my good fortune!